I would like to share with the entire Blogger world that I will be starting the next chapter in my life.
I have finished undergrad after going through so many emotional ordeals that have made me the person I have become today. And let me just say, it is a lot different from the girl who was nerdy, shy and quiet in elementary school, who then became surprisingly loud, mean, and self-absorbed throughout middle school to the beginning of high school, who then became tired of high school life and wanted something more as college life was creeping closer.
Then there was five years of college, which started out as a four-year plan. (Obviously, that didn't happen.) The first year of college was 2.5 hours away from home and filled with late night partying or last minute studying. That was definitely a learning experience trying to balance play time and study time. It definitely hit me hard that this was not going to be easy. Figuring out what my purpose in life was beyond confusing after my first year. I came back home thinking I was a complete failure in life. But I did not want to continue being a failure, and to be efficient with my time as I was contemplating about my future, I took general courses at a community college. I began researching different options and looking into what it is that I enjoy doing and would not mind doing for the rest of my life that is realistic and obtainable. Then I began the next plan that I had I set for myself to finish undergrad. Fall 2007. This was the semester that was the most blissful in my whole college career. I was really happy with what was going on in my life. I knew what I wanted to do in life and classes were going great, my friends and family were great and supportive, and it was my first time opening myself up to love. Several things have happened from then to now. Broken friendships. Broken hearts. Broken me. It was rough for me emotionally. Things I thought I knew, I didn't know anymore. What held me together was my goal to finish undergrad in order to go teach in Japan. And of course, I couldn't do it without the support and love from my family and friends who were there for me when I needed them the most. Even at weird times in the middle of the night. Thank you all. :)
I have learned that the only person you can really depend on is yourself. Next, is your family of course. After that are your friends who are there for you through thick and thin. I am no longer the type of person who wastes their time trying to mend unpromising broken friendships and hearts anymore because I know there are people who are there for me and who really care for me without those hopeless efforts. That was the biggest realization that I had. Relationships can start and end anytime. Whether it's love or friends, it is okay if it ends. It's super if it doesn't. Everyone grows, and sometimes it's in different directions and at different rates. I had such a hard time letting go. Then I realized, there is so much more to life. I was wasting my time being so caught up with what wasn't there anymore. And really, you can always create new relationships. Some may last forever or not so forever. I hope that this next chapter in a foreign country will let me make wonderful new relationships and strengthen the ones I already have. I can only see myself becoming a stronger and better person. Unless, there's some other realization that hasn't hit me yet.
I am SO ready for you, Japan!
